Working Stiff

All,

Hope you had a great summer! Now that the summer’s over we’re all back to work…even Logan! He has been working his little butt off around our house and I wanted you all to see what he’s up to.

It started innocently enough, with Logan rearranging our Tupperware, bowls and the like. He was having fun and chores were being done around the house. And then suddenly inspiration hit me! If he likes doing this kind of stuff so much maybe I could find some other work for him to do. What could be better? He works for ‘Nilla Wafers, loves boring jobs and although he does sort of a half-ass job, it still beats me having to do it!

Look at what other menial tasks he can do:

He helps load, change and fold our laundry! I’m missing 75% of my socks, my clothes are all pink and all my stuff smells a little off – but while he’s doing our laundry I can use that time to watch football and eat pie. It’s a win-win!

He sweeps the floor! He hasn’t quite mastered the dust pan yet and most dirt just ends up getting moved around, but again, it’s less work for me to do. Step 1 is the broom, then the mop and finally the tooth brush to get in-between the grout. And I know what you’re thinking, whose toothbrush will he use to clean the grout. The answer…Emily’s.

Logan even does heavy lifting! He pushed a stroller filled with our bags through three terminals on our last trip! While most other kids are IN their stroller, ours is behind it pushing 70 lbs. of crap…and loving every minute of it. Later that day he also helped the janitor clean the airport bathroom and even worked at Auntie Anne’s pretzels for an hour or so rolling dough. He really liked working at the airport. Perhaps he’s found his calling?

Here he is about to clean the entire house from top to bottom. All his supplies are here from the bleach to the vinegar to the windex – everything an 18 month old should be handling. I know, I know, he shouldn’t be touching any of this stuff – but the house ain’t gonna clean itself and just using paper towels dipped in water doesn’t get that streak free shine that Emily and I like so much. Don’t worry, he knows that ammonia is for scrubbin’, not for drinkin’. He’s a smart kid.

Yes, that’s right – he even does automotive repair! He fixed a flat tire for me and has even changed my oil on occasion. I don’t even know how to do that, but he does. I’ll tell ya, the stuff they teach these kids on that Baby Einstein is fantastic, or was it Baby Meineke? Whatever it was it’s entertaining, educational and practical too! People always talk about how they don’t have a good mechanic. For me that problem is solved. I mean, Logan’s not a good mechanic at all – but a car doesn’t need to “work correctly” or “be safe” – it just needs to look shiny and have tinted windows. At least that’s my motto.

Raking cement. You see, we start on cement and then move to leaves. One must walk before they can run. You can see the pure joy in Logan’s face from the raking. He loves to rake, what can I tell ya! He was not a fan, however, of the hoeing, tilling, tining, seeding, weeding, pruning, fertilizing or aerating that we had him do. All the blisters and bug bites and dirt, he was not a fan. There was another aspect of gardening that he did enjoy though…

Watering! He sure does like to water the plants, although as you can see by the picture he’s not all that good at it, but he’s working on being a better pourer. It’s hot out here in the desert, so watering plants is a very important job. We help Logan understand it by not giving him any water until the plants have had some first. That’s how you teach respect for both mother nature and for botanical science. A healthy respect for botany and insatiable thirst should be every parent’s wish for their child.


Yard work too? Yes indeed! We trained him on the toy mower but will be moving him to the real deal in a few weeks once he gets the feel for it. Nothing builds an infant’s character more then mowing lawns all day long. Every baby should be exposed to lawnmowers at a young age, I think. It has a certain allure. The whir of razor sharp blades spinning at 100 mph, the smell of gasoline in the morning sun and pushing a 50 lb. noise machine with exposed wires and sharp edges makes them really appreciate a simple puzzle or stuffed animal, believe you me. I wouldn’t let him touch the edger or weed whacker though, much too dangerous.

The Chinese have it all figured out. No, not the lead paint on toys thing (although that is a GREAT way to get rid of your excess lead), no I’m talking about child labor! They’ve known for centuries that kids, though small and rather uncoordinated, can still work long hours doing arduous tasks for no pay. Just blow some bubbles and give them some candy and they’ll do all your work for you. It’s the perfect system. Thank you Nike for making this all possible. I can’t wait until Emily and I have a bunch more kids, not because of the joys of a big family, but because soon I won’t have to lift a finger ever! And that will be glorious.

Have a great weekend!